I feel a bit sheepish after my last entry, but I needed to vent my thoughts, feelings, and frustrations with what’s been going on in my life.
On Friday, my sis Linda came over to help me with my classroom, and we got loads of work done. My classroom looks better. I just need a few finishing touches like colorful posters, plants, stuffed animals, and an area carpet with pillows. Once that’s in place, then my class will look top notch.
On Saturday, Leigh and I went to the optometrist’s to get our eyes checked for both contact lenses and glasses. We ended up getting our contact lenses and a prescription for eyeglasses. Then we headed to the mall, which I was dreading. I do not normally like to shop for clothing, and I thought that this day was going to be a stressful one by finding clothes that were either too long, too tight, or too unappealing. However, I was shocked since I hit the jackpot with one shopping department store: MACY’S. It was my first time ever in this store, and I found everything I needed there. I was so overjoyed! On our way out, I was even spoilt since Leigh bought me some perfume. I was enthralled because I looooooove shopping for perfume (and books and I’ve also been known to get excited in grocery stores that stock worldly cheeses, mushrooms,etc…) Anyway, we had a lovely shopping experience and then we ate lunch/dinner before coming back home.
The nurse Rachel rang me to inform us of Mom’s sugar levels which were unbelievably high. The first reading was 415 and then the second was 400. So the dr. ordered two insulin injection to lower the numbers. But she promised me that they were going to keep a watchful eye on Mom, and they were also going to test her levels three times a day. And once her levels were reading 150 or lower, then they would discontinue the insulin shots.
Today was Sunday, and we spent the afternoon shopping for groceries. During this time, I got a phone call from Sylvia, my eldest sister. She was informing me that Alicia, sis #2, had been to see Mom at lunchtime and that Mom was having to eat lunch in her bedroom since they were remodeling the dining room. This led me to question if Alicia had stayed with Mom to assist her with eating. She didn’t. And that set me off. I came unglued in the Produce section when I learnt that. I mean, what is wrong with her? Why would she have Sylvia ring me up to tell me about this dilemma yet do NOTHING to rectify the situation? Instead, she drove over 45 mins to go shop at the Wal-Mart here in town when there’s one a few seconds away from the facility. It really agitated me because I cannot comprehend her behavior. What would it have cost her to stay A FEW MINUTES with Mom to help her eat?
Anyway, Rachel (the nurse) rang me up thirty mins later to tell me that sis #2 was being demanding and adamant about knowing how much food Mother had eaten (she had eaten 100%) and what her sugar levels were (they were 232). After Rachel told her this info, she realized that she shouldn’t have so she called me to tell me of her mistake. I told her not to worry about it because they have so many people to look after that little mishaps like that were bound to happen. Plus, I explained that I had chewed out sis #2 (via Sylvia) because she had not stayed to help Mom eat. Instead, she found it more important to come shop at Wal-Mart. The nurse sighed and laughed. She said that she rarely sees sis#2 visiting. Yep, I told her that’s why she’s being bossy right now---she is trying to make up for not seeing Mom 29 out of the 31 days of the month. Sorry, but the truth hurts.
It took me a good while to calm down, and Leigh worked on distracting me while we were in the food aisles. But, eventually I did, and soon I found myself enthralled with the selection of spices, which I love to collect. The aroma of spices in the kitchen make me happy. They also remind me of Mom. She loved collecting spices, and she’d use them to make scrumptious meals that my sister and I both miss. But collecting (and using) them makes me feel a connection to Mom.
When we got home, I made comfort food for Leigh and myself. We needed something to make us happy. And so we had pot roast with rice, beans, and garlic bread. Yum Yum! I feel competent and whole when I am cooking. It makes me feel calm and I am truly alive in that moment---just like dance class. Somehow I don’t think it would be wise to dance while I cook. That might be dangerous. Lol!
At the moment, Leigh, Rocco and Theo are fast asleep while I type away. I still need to get my clothes laid out for tomorrow’s first day back at work (without the kiddos). Gosh, Summer has been a fleeting moment. Each day sort of melted into the next, and before I knew it, Summer was over.
